Monday, July 5, 2010
I totally forgot about humpbacks.
Batman and I are driving to his mom's house. The song "White Liar" by Miranda Lambert comes on.
Batman: "The truth comes out a little at a time?" That's kind of lame.
We drive in silence for a few minutes.
Batman: Blue.
Me: What?
Batman: Is.
Me: Yes?
Batman: My.
Me: Blue is your favorite color? Yeah, I know that.
Batman: You can't rush truth. It has to come out a little at a time.
We drive in silence for a little longer.
Batman: Whale.
Me: What?
Batman: Blue is my favorite whale.
Me: That's grammatically incorrect. And I don't even think that's true.
Batman: Are you questioning my whale preference?
Me: What about killer whales?
Batman: They're not really whales so they don't count*.
Me: Belugas? They look kind of cool, all white with a big head.
Batman: They look like moron whales. They are the morons of the sea.
Me: How about baleen whales?
Batman: They just suck stuff up. (makes a sucking sound like a vacuum) That's not cool.
Me: Sperm whales? Those should be good for at least a couple of jokes about their name.
Batman: They creep me out because I imagine them swimming around the ocean like tadpoles searching for a giant egg. What would happen if they find that egg? What would it turn into?
Me: What about whale sharks?
Batman: Aren't those sharks?
Me: Nah, they're whales**.
Batman: Then they should be called shark whales. Their name is backwards. I don't like them.
Me: So blue whales.
Batman: Yeah. Totally my favorite. Aren't you glad that the truth finally came out?***
*Not true.
**Also not true. We seem to like excluding whales from the whale family.
***Not particularly.
Labels:
Batman,
long jokes,
whale preferences
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