Sunday, December 4, 2011

Happy Canvent, the merriest holiday of them all.

Happy Canvent, everyone!  I hope you all enjoying celebrating this special time of year.


What, you don't know what Canvent is?  I'm shocked.  This holiday deserves a place in history along with Ludachristmas and Festivus.

Let me tell you a story of the origin of Canvent:  Once upon a time, there was a coworker with a very odd mother-in-law.  This mother-in-law thought it would be funny to bring a box of canned goods to her future daughter's bridal shower.  Yes, a box of canned goods.   With the labels ripped off.  No other gift.  No explanations or game to go along with it---the mother-in-law just laughed and said that it was a common practice.

Nothing says "welcome to the family" like a box of a cans without labels.

So what's a girl to do with a large box of unlabeled canned goods?  You can't donate them.  You don't really want to eat they sat in her garage until she made a mistake of telling her coworkers about it.  

And thus Canvent was created.  Every day from now until Christmas, our office will open up one can.  Bets will be placed on what it contains.  If it's not something too disgusting, we may even eat it.  

The winner of Canvent gets absolutely nothing (except the warm, fuzzy feeling of being right when everyone else is wrong--and really, who doesn't love that?)   And the winner of the first day of Canvent is....

It's a gift.  And a curse.

Insert pun about manwich and my knowledge of it here. 

Happy Canvent, y'all.  Maybe Canvent is an elaborate metaphor for how each of us, stripped of our labels, contain wildly different things on the inside.  Or maybe it's just a good excuse to be thankful that no matter what, your mother-in-law has never given you the gift of unlabeled cans.

Unless, of course, you happen to be my coworker.


  1. This is hilarious! And look at you... Lucky winner #1. Awesome.

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